inherently different

Archive for October, 2004

I had a dream a few nights ago. One in which the country was saved from another four years of really poor management. Unfortunately, they really bad managers were given new jobs. Jobs in which they were fundamentally responsible for the education of our nation’s youth.

They created a television show that subliminally changed a child’s abilities to reason and think clearly. The poor management team used color and psychadelic imagery to break down rational thought patterns. It was only a dream right? Right?

The fact that Ralph Nader is still running for President of the free world scares me. Is there any doubt that he has the biggest ego on the face of the planet? The way I figure it, Nader is being motivated by one of two different things.

The first, is as I stated above… Ego. Here is a man who has spent his entire life fighting to be heard. First by consumers, then by corporations, then by America at large. No one has listened… well, maybe a few tree-huggers, but even they are tired of his played out shit.

The second is that his motivation might be something more sinister. I don’t think there is anyone left with half a brain that fails to see that Nader’s run for the Presidency is taking votes away from Kerry. I don’t think there is a Republican alive who would vote for Nader. The man is evil incarnate to any card-carrying Republican. Of course, that doesn’t stop card-carrying Republicans from shaking with glee everytime they see Nader on a stage somewhere grandstanding. No, I think that it is in the best interest of Republicans if Nader continues to seek votes.

Here is where I start thinking conspiracy and wearing a little tinfoil hat: The Bush campaign is paying Nader vast sums of money to steal votes away from Kerry. Yep, you read it here first. Ralph Nader is a Bush League puppet.

Location: Starbucks
Two tourists, married I think. The woman looks like she is New Jersey 50 which is to say that she must be 40 or so, but hard living, cigarettes and a bad attitude have taken their toll. She is wearing a BUSH/CHENEY t-shirt. The man is in shorts, a HUGE hawaiian shirt, is overweight, balding and brow-beaten by years of spousal abuse.

Her: Seriously, I can’t fucking wait to get back home to the states. These fucking indians don’t know how to treat customers!
Him: We’re in Hawaii. This is part of the United States. These here ain’t indians, they’re hawaiians.
Her: Did I ask you? Did I? Who fucking cares where we are. The point is that they shouldn’t let these ingrates into OUR country.
Him: This IS their country. We took it over a long time ago.
Her: Oh, what do you know?

Ahhh, nothing like a Republican on vacation.

I think that the US justice system is pretty flawed. In fact, it really shouldn’t be called the justice department at all, because let’s face facts… few people really get what they deserve.

One of the things that bothers me most is the sheer cost of incarceration. If we take into account the total population currently residing in state and federal prisons in the US (1,355,748 people as of June 30, 2002) and multiply it by the average cost to board each prisoner for one day ($46.58) the amount of tax dollars being spent daily ($63,150,741) to keep criminals alive is a sizable. If we project that number over a year ($23,050,020,771) we’re talking about a sizable portion of the national debt.

Anyone who has read my blog for any length of time already knows my stance on the death penalty. If we just executed everyone who committed a violent crime (okay, just those who are undeniably guilty… for instance, anyone who admits it or is caught in the act), then we’d save a few million. Of course, some would find this distasteful. The problem with prisons though is that they are actually criminal colleges where convicts take accelerated courses in criminal capers. So, what can we do to stop the criminals from spending their time in prison to perfect their chosen profession?

Chemically induced comas. Yep, I say we medicate the fuckers for the duration of their sentences. I’m sure many of you have seen the movie Coma. While it was made in 1978, the science behind the fiction could easily be adapted to another use. Imagine an entire building filled to the rafters with criminals who are serving their sentences without the possibility of riots, murders, sexual predation, drugs, gang warfare, and all the normal ills that make US prisons the bane of Amnesty International! If managed on a large scale, the prohibitive costs of caring for people in vegatative states is greatly reduced. The electrical and mechanical apparatus could be purchased in bulk. One man or woman could theoretically monitor the well-being of hundreds of inmates each day. Instead of having hundreds of guards, a few dozen nurses could handle as many as 1500 inmates. The space necessary for something like this would also decrease since the inmates could be stacked like cordwood, one on top of the other, suspended by various wires and guidelines.

The end result is that the convict is truly punished for their crime, doesn’t benefit from their period of incarceration in a negative manner and lowers the burden on society. It is a win win win situation as far as I can see… anyone know the proper method of inducing a coma without causing lasting damage?

I read The Life of Pi early this summer and wanted to comment on it, but found that I really couldn’t form any thoughts worthy of putting down on here. An earlier post, The One Where I Speak of God, touches upon some of what I learned from the book as well as some of what I’ve developed over time.

If you haven’t read The Life of Pi yet and have unconventional views about religion, I think you’d enjoy it. If you have more traditionalist views of religion and how to worship, then perhaps this book might help you see religious ideology with a more open mind. I don’t think the story of a teenaged Indian boy lost at sea with only a wild Bengal Tiger for company can change your life… it is afterall only a book. I do, though, believe that the metaphorical journey one must make to understand the value of passionate understanding of religion’s role in everyday life is one worth exploring. Your experience may differ, but I really enjoyed the book.

I know many people still watch this show despite that the show is now only available on syndicated TV. I know many women who like to believe their lives mirror that of the characters on this show. I also know that this show is one of the most ridiculous shows on TV.

I had a friend who spoke of this show the way some people speak of religion… which is to say she was a maniacal cackling fool.

I often wonder why women gravitate toward certain shows just as I am sure some women wonder why men gravitate toward some shows. I guess the difference is that the shows men watch, in my estimation anyway, don’t harm them.

Sex in the City is an unrealistic representation of life. The women are all so flawed as humans, it would be difficult for me to even want to know they existed in real life much less as characters that some real women would like to emulate.

I’m sure some of my female readers, especially those who are fans of this show, will say that I just don’t understand or worse, that these women are empowered. I am not the target demographic (admittedly, I am male, have a brain, self-estem and taste), but that shouldn’t preclude me from commenting on whether or not this show is crap. Ladies… this show is indeed crap.

Addendum: Okay, I should probably have said that I wouldn’t comment on something without having first hand knowledge. I have watched a number of episodes of Sex and the City, scattered across the history of the show. Some the first season, a few the second, one or two the third… etc. In other words, enough to know that Sex and the City is crap. I feel unclean knowing that I’ve wasted a few hours of my life being bludgeoned by this affront to the medium.

Ever watched this particular film? If you haven’t and you claim to be a movie fan, you’re missing out. I’d rank this film in the top three all-time.

Papillon is the true story of Henri Charriere, a petty criminal who was sent to the worst prisons France had to offer in the early 1900s. It features brilliant performances by Steve McQueen and Dustin Hoffman.

Many new readers have sent me messages about my pretty small blogroll… actually, links to other blogs are pretty light in general. This isn’t due to, as some would believe, “jealousy” and “playa hating,” but because just about every blog in the blogosphere gets more traffic than I do, so I doubt a link on my site really generates much traffic for any site I do link. So, to review, it is because I’m a hack and few people read my daily missives. Or it could be that my genius escapes them (hey you believe what you want, and I’ll believe what I want!).

I mainly use my blogroll to access the blogs I read regularly… a few of them I’ve grown disinterested in, but I still keep them. Perhaps it is time to purge the lot of you?

The chances are I won’t link you even if you ask nicely. I only link the sites that I find entertaining and don’t care if they link me in return. This blog, despite my blogwhoring move of subscribing to blogexplosion, isn’t about traffic… it is about keeping the thoughts that prevented me from attending the really good colleges at bay. Some days I win… some days I don’t.

I’ve built a blog so you can follow along in my quest to write 50.000 words in 30 days. Remember, the words don’t necessarily have to combine to create a well-crafted, thoroughly engaging novel… the words just need to pile up until there are 50,000 of them consecutively placed somewhere. I think even I can manage that…

The bottom line is I need to write 1670 words per day. I poop 1670 words between breakfast and lunch… which is to say that most of what you’ll see in my novel would normally end up in the white bowl in my lavatory. But as I said, this is all about quantity not quality…

I’m a sports fanatic. In fact, I’ve attended a few World Series games, two Superbowls, a Sugar Bowl, a fiesta bowl, a Stanley Cup Final, an Indoor Soccer Championship, an IHL championship, a AVP Tour Championship, and a Championship Boxing match.

To counterbalance the collection of athletes and teams I root for, I have an equally populated list of sports “enemies!” Outside of their particular sport I don’t wish them ill. I can appreciate them as human beings or individuals, but if they are on the wrong team or competing against one of my favorites, there isn’t a hole in Hell deep enough to contain my overflowing contempt.

Some sports franchises have pushed me beyond the usual contempt I reserve for the enemy. The New York Yankees are one of those teams.

I don’t care if Stalin, Mussolini, Freddy Krueger, Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden, Barry Bonds, John McEnroe, Charro, and Ommarosa took to the field for a winner take all match against them, I would still root against the Yankees. Hell, nine guys who club baby seals for a living would get my allegiance before any Yankee team.

Last night was fun because I started watching the hype build throughout the day. CNN, ABC, FOX, and an alphabet soup of media outlets covered the rising importance of the game between the Yankees and Red Sox. I watched a countless number of New Yorkers bag on the historically hapless Beantown ballers and their inability to win “the big game.” As if I needed another reason to root against Steinbrenner’s evil minions, a win by the Red Sox would mean New Yorkers would have to shut their gaping pie holes until next April.

Unlike many opportunities that preceded last night’s game, the Red Sox didn’t waste this one. Congrats to the Red Sox and to all their fans. Few franchises in sports deserve the opportunity to play for all the marbles as much as you.

As for the Yankees? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!