I forgot to add this bit to New Gold Dream…
If you want to know something about the person you’re dating/married to, take them out to dinner and have them deal with the waiter/waitstaff. How they treat people in such situations is a good indication of who they are when the “shields” are down.
My husband, who is a waiter and has worked in F&B in various roles for most of his career, would agree 100%.