I’m 38 and unmarried. Some may opine, not unreasonably, that the fact that I’m not married has more to do with the fact that no woman is willing to put up with my shit. Not completely true.
It is my belief that there are certain paths a man must walk before he walks down the aisle. I like to think of the time before you get married as a game called manbingo (not to be mistaken with mandingo which is a game white women play with rather large black men).
The rules for playing manbingo are fairly simple. In manbingo you need to cross certain feats off a list (called the manbingo card) as they happen or as soon as reasonably possible. Most dedicated manbingo players commonly carry their manbingo cards with them wherever they may roam, cause lets face it, you never know when a troop of lost Swedish sex therapists might cross your path (typically #16 on the average manbingo card for those keeping score).
Manbingo cards have five rows and five columns with random numbers filling each square. Each of these numbers has a corresponding “action” that is commonly agreed upon by all the players of your particular manbingo game. The center of the card holds a star or the “free space” which is automaticallly filled.
If you are the first to complete ALL the “actions” on a card, you move on to a harder collection of actions. Ladies, if you have a man and he’s reluctant to walk down the aisle, chances are he’s still got many, many manbingo squares to fill.